High-Caliber Concealer Read online

  Jackson and Captain Beaumont were sitting on the porch. Jackson was wrapped in a blanket and looked hung-over as a cliff, bleary-eyed and hair sticking straight up.

  “It’s weird!” said Nikki getting out of the car.

  “OK,” said Jackson. Captain Beaumont jumped the stairs to bounce around Nikki, interrupting her view of Jackson periodically with a flopping dog head. “Are we arguing about something that I don’t remember? Can I get a definition of what ‘it’ is or am I guessing?”

  “The idea of you dating Jenny is weird.”

  “It’s a little weird,” he agreed, nodding.

  “Yes! Thank you. Why does no one else see it?”

  “Well, I think we all see it. I’m just thinking about doing it anyway.”

  “Yes, Captain. Yes, I see you too.” She paused to pat Captain Beaumont and then climbed onto the porch and flopped down in the chair next to Jackson. “That’s probably fair. I mean, you guys do have a lot in common with your rodeo obsessions. But you know, it’s weird. And besides, I thought you were going to try and win me back, etc.”

  “Yeah, but that was when I thought you were dating a douchebag IRS guy or something. Then I met Z’ev. You’re right. He’s definitely not a cubicle guy. And I may be stubborn, but I know when I’m beat. I don’t stand a chance while he’s around.” There was a pause while they stared at the view.

  “Except that I shouldn’t let him be around,” said Nikki sadly.

  “He’s not stupid,” said Jackson. “He probably already knows that something isn’t right. Why not tell him?”

  “It’s not just me,” said Nikki, shaking her head. “I have the team to consider.”

  “Well, I don’t know everything that’s going on with you and your ‘team,’ but that doesn’t seem fair to you.”

  Nikki sighed. “Since when is life fair? I need to ovary up, as Jane says, and just do it. He loves me and keeping him in a relationship based on lies is unfair to him. I love him, but I can’t be a good partner to him and I should set him free to find someone who can.”

  “I understand that,” said Jackson. “But I thought that about you and in retrospect it’s pretty clear that I underestimated you. Don’t underestimate Z’ev.”

  “You didn’t underestimate me, though,” said Nikki. “Everything you’ve said about that point in our lives was true. If you had stayed, I would have clung to you and insisted you stay in school. We would have moved in together after college and you’d be miserable in some nine-to-five job you hate and I would have probably made us move across the country so I could pursue a career in linguistics that I would have ended up hating, but would be too scared to leave. I never would have joined Carrie Mae or met the girls. That’s what changed me. I’m a better human being because you left. You made the right decision.”

  Jackson shook his head, looking like he wanted to argue, but he didn’t. When he finally met her eye, he smiled. “We really are OK, you and me?”

  “Yeah,” said Nikki. “We really are.” He nodded and they were both silent for a long while. “The grapes look nice. I haven’t been up here since I was a kid and who was it that lived here? The Kramer’s?”

  “Yeah. I won’t ask Jenny out if you think it’s too weird,” he said.

  “Nah. She’s awesome, you’re awesome. Why shouldn’t the two of you at least go on a date?” Nikki scratched her head and then redid her pony tail. “It has been a long-ass day and it’s barely three. I really thought this trip was going to be more of a vacation.”

  “There’s coffee in the kitchen.”

  “No thanks. I need to wake Donny up and put him to work.”

  “I think,” said Jackson and then squinted toward the road. “Are we expecting your boyfriend? I think that’s his rental car.”

  “I wasn’t expecting my boyfriend the first time, so sure, why not? He’s full of surprises. Jackson, did you know my dad went to jail?”

  “Your dad went to jail?” Jackson looked surprised. “When?”

  “Apparently, that’s why Mom moved us to Seattle. Dad didn’t just up and leave us.”

  “That does make more sense,” said Jackson. “He always seemed devoted to you guys. Or at least you, anyway. What did he get arrested for?”

  “Holding with intent to distribute. Pot. He was extradited to Canada. But you didn’t know before now?”

  “No, my dad got transferred, remember? We left the year before you did. Although, now something Donny said makes way more sense. Something about undercover life running in the family. We were like twelve beers in, so I never circled back to that. You know, I have to say that having you guys back in town is the first time that it’s felt like I moved home.”

  Nikki laughed. “I know what you mean. At some point last night while I was chasing you, and Donny was whining, it felt like we were twelve again. Living in LA is great, and of course, I have the girls, but there’s that feeling that everyone in the whole city is from somewhere else. There’re no roots. There’s no one who’s known me since I was five.”

  “You mean, there’s no one who can call you on your bullshit?”

  Z’ev’s rental car bumped to a stop next to Val’s Impala. Nikki wondered if the Impala would ever stop being Val’s.

  “Oh, I think I’m about to get called on my bullshit,” said Nikki. “And look, you’ve got a front row seat.”

  But it wasn’t just Z’ev. The entire team spilled out of the car.

  “It’s Beach Blanket Bingo,” said Jackson, surveying the array of swimsuits.

  “And I’m Annette Funicello,” said Nikki.

  “I am not Frankie Avalon,” said Z’ev.

  “Nikki, what the hell was that?” demanded Ellen, planting her feet and putting her hands on her hips. “Do you really think that we’re not pulling our own weight and we’re horning in on your vacation? We came to help you. If you need more help, you just have to ask. You know that.”

  “And I can date whoever I want!” said Jenny, who waved at Jackson.

  “I’m here because everyone else was going,” said Jane. “And I thought I should come and support you since we already settled our issue.”

  Nikki looked at her team with affection and wished she hadn’t talked to Mrs. M. Looking at them now, it was as if they each had little Google location pins over their heads, giving off their future on the hover-over. Nikki wondered if Mrs. M was hoping that she and Jenny would end up as Division Leaders for the East and West Coasts at the same time. That would certainly make policy changes easier. Ellen and Jane, would they have their own teams? Would they go on to be branch leaders? Did they even want that? Or, like Nikki, were they dreading the day they’d be pushed out of the team? It occurred to Nikki to wonder if she was standing in the way of their ambitions.

  “I know you’re here to help,” said Nikki, and Ellen looked surprised, while Z’ev looked suspicious. “But sometimes it feels like the decisions are always up to me. It’s hard to relax when I always have to be keeping track of everyone, and today has been a bit of a hard day.”

  “She found out her dad didn’t leave her and that, really, he went to prison for smuggling pot,” interjected Jane.

  “What?” said Ellen. “When did that happen? Honey, why didn’t you say? That’s terrible!”

  “It’s not that big a deal,” said Jenny, kindly. “I’ve got, like, three cousins in prison for moonshining. Even the really good families have a few rats in the woodpile.”

  “It doesn’t matter. I shouldn’t have yelled at you. It’s just, you know, Grandma and Jorge, Mom lying about my dad for years, and then Ylina and the sheriff on top of it. I snapped. I’m sorry. I feel like I’ve been wrong about everything since I got here.”

  “Peg finally told you about Jorge?” Jackson looked pleased. “I told her it wouldn’t be that big of a deal.”

  “Well, I wouldn’t say told, exactly,” said Nikki. “But let’s just say I know.”

  “Nikki,” said Z’ev. He said it quietly, which is wha
t made Nikki look at him. She hated it when he was quiet. It meant he had been thinking. He was far too smart to let him think. “Nikki, what about the sheriff? What’s going on with him?”

  “Ah. Yes, the sheriff. Jackson, where’s Donny? I need to talk to him about the sheriff.”

  “He’s not here,” said Jackson. “The sheriff finally called him back and he went out to the sheriff’s house to talk to him. Don’t ask me how, because I’m kind of missing that portion of the evening in my memory, but Donny knows there’s a smuggling ring in town and he wants to talk strategy with the sheriff. He even knows about Milt and Pedro and Bill Pims.”

  Nikki felt the blood drain from her face. She felt adrenaline hit her blood stream and her heart speed up. To compensate, she sat even more still. Adrenaline could make you panic, drive you into flight or fight. Now was not the time for either. Now was the time to make a careful plan.

  “Oh, crap,” said Jane, her hands flying up to cover her mouth. “He’s going to be buried next to Luis.”

  August XXVII

  Unravel

  “Who’s Luis?” asked Ellen.

  “I don’t know,” said Jane, “But Donny’s going to end up buried next to him if we don’t do something fast. Crap, crap, crap! Nikki, what do we do?”

  Nikki felt the group’s attention shift to her like a weight on her shoulders. What she wouldn’t give for a real vacation where someone else was in charge and made all the decisions. She reached over and took Jackson’s coffee cup to buy herself a little more time. “OK,” she said, taking a sip. She needed to do a few things. She needed to find out if Donny was still alive. She needed to find out where he was being held. And she needed to get Jenny working on an extraction plan. But most of all she needed to get rid of Jackson and Z’ev.

  “I think Jackson and Z’ev should –”

  “No,” said Z’ev, folding his arms across his chest.

  “You haven’t even heard what I was going to say.”

  “I don’t need to hear what you’re going to say,” said Z’ev. “I’ve had enough. The rubber is meeting the road. Either I’m in or I call my friends at the DEA.”

  “How far away are your friends at the DEA?” asked Nikki, hoping for a life-line. Maybe the DEA could solve all her problems at once.

  “About three hours,” said Z’ev.

  “Nikki, I don’t think he has that long,” said Jane quietly.

  “He could already be dead,” said Nikki. “We don’t know.”

  “Nikki!” Jackson took his coffee cup back. “What the hell are you talking about? What is going on? And for the record, I’m with Es Grande; I’m not going anywhere.”

  Nikki sighed, weighing her options. Nikki looked from Jane to Jenny to Ellen. Ellen shrugged fatalistically and Jenny nodded. Whole truth, half-truth, quarter truth? Of course, the answer was never whole truth.

  “You remember Ylina? The girl we met at the bar.”

  “Yes, what’s she got to with anything?”

  “I ran into her last night and—”

  “When?” demanded Z’ev. “I was with you the whole night.”

  “When I was chasing Jackson. I cut through the junkyard and ran into her.”

  “That is cheating!” Jackson was outraged.

  “Of course, it’s cheating. How else was I going to catch you? Can we focus? Anyway, Ylina gave me a thumb drive. She said it was her insurance policy.” Jane began to studiously study her nail polish, which for Jenny and Ellen was a dead giveaway that Nikki was lying. “When I went to return it to her today I found out that she’d been killed.”

  “Seriously?” Jackson looked shocked.

  “Yes, and when Jane and I opened the thumb drive we found audio recordings that prove that Sheriff Merv Smalls is the head of the organization smuggling pot South out of Canada.”

  “Holy crap,” said Jackson, unconsciously echoing Jane.

  “And if Donny has gone to tell the Sheriff that he knows about half of the smuggling operation, how long do you think Donny’s life expectancy is?”

  “Not three hours,” said Z’ev. “Will state police mobilize on a tip any faster?”

  “Not from some random group of women. What about someone from the, uh, government?”

  “Nikki, I’m fairly certain you’ve told Jenny, Ellen, and Jane I work for the CIA. I appreciate the pretense, but it would make the conversation a lot quicker if we skipped the ambiguity.”

  “You work for the CIA? Holy crap! Who are you people?”

  “Jackson, you may not have picked the best morning for a hangover,” said Nikki, patting him on the shoulder. “Sorry.”

  “Meanwhile, we need to come up with a plan.” Z’ev paced from the car to the porch and back. Nikki watched him with affection. Jane and the girls seemed puzzled. “OK, I think you girls should stay here, while—“

  Z’ev’s comments were cut off by a hysterical laugh from Jenny. “I’m sorry, sweetie,” she said, still laughing. “That was really funny right then. Nikki, what do you want to do?”

  They were staring at her. More specifically, Z’ev was staring at her. She was stuck. Whatever she said next was going to reveal a lot to him. Her choices were to help Donny or preserve Carrie Mae’s secret from her CIA agent boyfriend. And neither of those choice probably included an option for preserving her relationship. She was at the edge of the cliff and one way or another she was going down. Her only real choices were to see if she was going to slip and fall or go off in a swan dive. What had Jane said? Nikki likes to swan?

  “Call the sheriff,” said Nikki. “Offer a swap. The thumb drive for Donny.”

  “We can’t give him the evidence!” said Jackson.

  “Jane will upload it to the cloud or whatever and send it to Z’ev’s DEA friends. I think we should still call them in for back-up. But I don’t think we can wait for them. The cloud is a thing, right Jane?”

  Z’ev wasn’t saying anything. That probably wasn’t a good sign.

  “Well, it is a thing, sort of. It’s a little more complicated than that.” Jane had the uncomfortable look she wore when something Nikki said was a total misrepresentation of what she did.

  “You know how I feel about complicated,” said Nikki, and Jane sighed.

  “You don’t care as long as it gets done.” Jane trudged up the stairs, past Jackson. “Jackson, what’s your wi-fi password?”

  “I don’t have a wi-fi password,” said Jackson. Jane looked slightly ill. “Who’s going to steal my wi-fi? The cows?”

  “OK, well, give me a few minutes, then, Z’ev, I’ll need some contact info for your DEA friends.”

  “Before you do that, can you look up the sheriff’s number?” asked Nikki.

  “I can do that,” said Jackson.

  “You have the sheriff’s number?”

  “No, I have the Kaniksu Falls telephone book.” Jackson reached down and removed a slim volume from under the leg of the table next to him. They all stared at the telephone book and Nikki poked it suspiciously with one finger.

  “Is it really accurate? It has actual phone numbers?”

  “Yeah. They update it every three years.”

  “That’s weird.”

  “You’re only saying that because you live in a city where it’s weird to know your neighbors.” Jackson flipped through until he found the page he was looking for. “There you go, Merv Smalls, address and home phone number.”

  “You know, even if he agrees to the trade, he’s not going to let Donny live,” said Ellen.

  “Or anyone else he thinks might be a threat,” said Z’ev.

  “Yeah, I do know. But he only knows about me. He might suspect that I’ll bring Jackson in, but the rest of you are going to be a complete surprise.” Nikki dialed the number and waited. On the fourth ring, someone picked up.

  “Yeah,” said a male voice.

  “This is Nikki Lanier. I need to speak to Merv Smalls about Ylina.”

  “He’s busy.”

  “Is this Pedr
o? Pedro, put the sheriff on the phone or I’ll drive out there and break your nose again.”

  There was a pause. “Give me a minute.”

  There was rustling and some distant, muffled yelling.

  “Ms. Lanier, this is a surprise,” said the sheriff. “I was under the impression that you would be headed back to LA by now.”

  “Sorry to disappoint,” said Nikki. “But I had to stop by Crazy Cooter’s and pick up a few of Ylina’s things.”

  “I see,” said Merv. “I didn’t realize the two of you were that close.”

  “We weren’t, but it’s funny how no one in this town really likes you. Crazy Cooter didn’t mind if I went through Ylina’s computer or took the thumb drive she left. You know, the one with all the recordings she made of you and your friends.”

  The sheriff was silent for a long moment. “What do you want?”

  “I want Donny Fernandez back in one piece.”

  “And are you suggesting that some sort of mutually beneficial arrangement could be made?”

  “If Donny is still alive, then yes.”

  She heard the sound of dragging. “Say hello to your friend,” said the Sheriff.

  “Hi,” said Donny. There was a smacking noise.

  “A little bit more, please,” said the Sheriff.

  “Go fuck yourself,” said Donny, his tone was flat and angry, but still definitely Donny.

  “Donny, hang in there. I’ll get you out of this.”

  “Mr. Fernandez doesn’t look too confident,” said the sheriff.

  “Mr. Fernandez just has to stay alive.”

  “And how do I know that you haven’t made copies of the recordings?” asked the Sheriff reasonably.

  “It’s six gigs of data,” said Nikki. “I don’t have anything to copy it to or with and I certainly haven’t had the time. The thumb drive is the only copy.”

  “And you’re the only one who knows about it?”

  “Did my father talk when you stole his operation out from under him?”